Baby Progress, Mama Progress...sort of.

Yesterday I sat Reid up against the arm of the sofa and put Sophie the Giraffe in front of him so that he could grab on to her if he wished. He hadn't really grabbed intentionally yet, but if we put a ring in his hand, he will wave it around. I soon realized the error of my ways: he is not ready to grasp on to things with one hand yet. He is, however, ALLLLLMOST ready to bring both hands to the object, then bring the object to his mouth. He was almost there with Sophie, but not quite. About half an hour later, I decided to try the same with the Grab Apple and he did it almost right away! Amazing that a toy called a Grab Apple would encourage grabbing! I can barely believe it myself! It is incredible to watch Reid developing before my eyes.

As for my own development...you may all be wondering how I'm doing with my "let it be what it will be" philosophy. Or you may not, but I'm gonna tell you anyway. Not well. I can't relax in clutter. I hate when the dishes aren't done (or at least are not stacked neatly in the sink). I hate when I haven't showered by noon. I hate it when I haven't had a good workout (that whole not caring about my weight thing is not really happening either). I have divided weekly chores into 5 days: for example, Monday is Kitchen Day, Tuesday Dining Room, and so on, and if I don't complete the day's "task," it can put me in kind of a mood.

So here's what I did: I bit the bullet and bought the Ergo baby carrier. I hate to subscribe to one single parenting philosophy (or any philosophy for that matter - ideally I'd just do what feels right and call it a day), but Dr. Sears is my homeboy, and he is a very big fan of Babywearing. I tried the sling that was actually developed by Sears himself. First, Reid was too little. He sunk down in it and it just made me too nervous (though this was NOT a sling involved in the recent recall). Then all of a sudden he was too big and strong, and seemed to be practicing for a sport called "Flip the Baby" - imagine you are in an unstable hammock and you all of a sudden lock your knees and arch your back. Human Pancake!

I also tried the Moby Wrap. I wanted that thing to work so bad. I wanted to be one of those moms who was effortlessly wearing her baby around the farmers market and the music festivals. It was great when he was tiny, but when he tried the "Flip the Baby" move in the Moby, he was met with yards and yards of tight fabric, which made him a very angry boy indeed.

Enter the Ergo. I had such high hopes for this, and so far it has delivered. I have no idea how it is possible to wear a 16-lb child and barely feel an ounce, but this carrier makes it happen. Reid's got some room to wiggle and squirm, but not enough that I feel insecure with him in it. Mostly he is content to just look around and take it all in. He sleeps really well after he's been worn (and if he's in there for more than half an hour, he usually falls asleep in it). Yesterday I was able to do the dishes (of which there were many), tidy the house, walk the dogs, and throw in some deep squats for good measure (see: still caring about weight). And, coincidentally, last night was the best night of sleep we've had in several days.

Conclusion: baby wearing is good for Reid and good for me. So even though I haven't achieved the Zen Mama attitude I was hoping for, I consider it progress that I found a way to indulge my control-freakiness while also doing something good for Reid.

Now, I am off to complete the day's task (bathroom!) while this moppet is still sleeping (progress!). We'll discuss how Reid naps best in his carseat, and how I've finally decided to let it happen (PROGRESS!!!!!), at a later date.

Hey, the word "Progress" has lost all meaning to me, and looks really funny at this point.
Also, is anyone else super impressed with my newfound ability to hyperlink?

I QUIT

I am not exaggerating: I absolutely love 98% of motherhood. Seriously. When he's crying, when I'm tired, when I haven't showered in 2 days, when I'm covered in spit-up at 4am, when I get peed on while changing a diaper at the zoo, I still know how lucky I am to be able to have this little guy. Being covered in his pee is so much better than not having him. Reid is a remarkably easy baby, I realize, but I'm doing my fair share of work and sacrifice too.

So what's the 2%, you ask? Those stupid (insert words I won't say in front of a baby) cloth diapers.

The pee smell never seems to leave them, no matter how many times I soak and wash them with baking soda and vinegar. Then I have to dry them twice because they hold onto water and if I don't, they smell like damp, musty laundry. But see, that absorbency doesn't seem to work with the actual pee because I have already been through 2 (really cute!) outfits today due to leaks. Reid is 2 months old and change. One day, he will refuse to bathe or will roll around with Caffrey (or stand in the same room with Jesse) and he'll be the Smelly Kid on his own. He shouldn't have to be the Smelly Kid now when he has no choice in the matter.

I've tried everything I can think of, and everything I've read online to make these problems disappear and they just don't. And I dread the diapering part of my day. And I loathe the diaper laundering part of my day.

So, I quit. I'll use the Seventh Generation diapers, which are chemical-free, and that will be that.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a diaper to go change.